when the attack comes..

trust me, it feels like hell. I know, I know, every things has two faces, plus and less. unfortunately, now I feel the less. anybody has any idea what I’m talking about? yea, it’s about long distance. long distance sickness. I’ve been feeling it getting worse lately. the feelings seem cannot be handled. it’s like I need more power to handle all of my negative feelings. I’ve got a lot of papers to do, I’ve got a lot of jobs to finish, I’ve got a lot of things to have done. and, I miss him. that makes things worse. no, I do want to miss him, but it’s just about how to manage the feelings. when I depressed of my college and job, then I really really miss him so bad, then I can’t handle it, it will be a problem. I guarantee.

the thing is, there’s possibility that he cannot come back next week. so I have to wait 2 or 3 more weeks. that means, we haven’t met for 2 months. and it’s awful. plus, I have an event at the end of this month, so if he comes back at the end of this month, maybe I can’t meet him. so it’s complete, the sickness.

I just feel so bad lately. I told you before that I seem to not having enough time with him. and when I woke up this evening, I felt awful. I really want to meet him. I really do. then I said to him that maybe I can’t handle this. and he keeps telling me that I can. then, the thoughts of Mieun came.

I thought that her feelings was might be worse. she can’t meet her family and boyfriend for at least 6 months. isn’t it so hard? it’s obviously harder than me. then I thought that we, me and him, live still at the same island, we live still at the same country, we live still under the same sky, we still having each other.

so what the reasons for me to keep feeling bad? I can handle these things, I must be can \m/

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